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Post by Kasey James on Aug 6, 2016 17:09:32 GMT -7
Somehow, Kasey felt she should have expected the first part of that answer. A lot of things came easier with time and practice. It seemed that, somewhere along the way, murder did, as well. And from what she knew, it was exactly the people Alex talked about that were being taken down. The ones who caused problems, when putting it mildly. The violence that filled the area she called home, people who preyed on others. Hearing that, it was a little easier to accept.
She nodded her head in agreement, then shook as she realized what she was thinking. Murder was murder, a fact that settled deep in her gut and took up residence there. There was no way that willing, intentional murder could be good. Except that his doing so was doing good. She benefited from it, as did others, even if she didn't agree with it. And, as he pointed out, whether she did or not didn't matter. He'd do what he pleased.
But was she okay with that?
"Well...you're not wrong." The words came reluctantly, but they did come. If anything less would work, then it would have by now on some level. In a way, she owed him for being a murderer, and if that wasn't messed up, she didn't know what was. Then again, look at what the cops did for them.
Nothing.
At least he wasn't asking her to like it.
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Post by Alex Spencer on Aug 6, 2016 17:17:26 GMT -7
Indeed he wasn't.
"Fight or flight is for more than just animals. When actions bear consequences with increasingly higher stakes people will either forgo those options or push back. Those that push back in this care are the most habitual criminals. With violence and corruption so ingrained in them that they don't have anything else but this kind of life. Those are the ones that need to be stopped. But not just the hitmen and the thugs. The money behind it as well.
Organized crime is just that. Organized. You take out the pillars and it will crumble. You cut off the head of the first snake and another will take it's place, true. But do it again, and then again, and again. And they will get the message. When the position is seen as a death sentence people will stop seeking it out."
And with it vacant the crime body would wither and die. It wouldn't be overnight, but nothing in this world was easy if it was worth doing. Lasting change didn't happen overnight. And change wasn't always welcome. It upset the balance, people had levels of comfort built upon this system. And he would upset that balance. He'd make enemies on all sides. Because he brought pain, the kind of pain you couldn't just ignore. Bottom lines would hurt. People would die. But with each victory there was one less predator on the streets.
One less coward pretending to be strong.
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Post by Kasey James on Aug 6, 2016 18:06:00 GMT -7
"So then you're literally working from the ground up." It was the one thing that made this conversation possible, rather than Kasey just noping right off and never looking back. The methods, again, she didn't agree on, but what else had worked in teh past? Most people preferred not to die; it tended to be rather permanent.
Her hands fell to her sides as they walked, the silence turning contemplative.
"I can understand that. There's a lot of places for the pillars to get stronger at." She knew he'd understand what she meant. When you're so-called protectors were busy protecting people with money and prestige, you became your own hero. Unless you were a super, that is. The rebuilding and improvement of the slums had also been coordinated by a super, which was odd to her, though people had been disappearing even during that. She wondered what it would be like not to have to worry about that one day. It probably wouldn't come in her lifetime.
"And here you call me the one in darkness." The reference to their improv came out before she thought, looking for a way to keep herself from reiterating what they'd already covered, but it was also true. For all he'd played the prince of light, there were definitely more than a few sunspots to be seen.
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Post by Alex Spencer on Aug 6, 2016 20:02:11 GMT -7
Yeah, he got what she meant. There was a lot going on out there, the police was corrupt. The mafia had it's fingers everywhere. The Bulwark claimed to be fighting crime but they seemed to cause more damage than anything. You had rumors of a mysterious group of Supers pulling the strings of the mob and every other big player in the city. Not to mention Pandaemonium itself. He hadn't aligned himself with a beacon of justice. But then again, he was hardly a beacon himself. Despite the little improv act that implied otherwise.
He'd shift and face her, lifting a finger under her chin to push her head up to look at him. A small smile on his lips as he sunk down slightly closer to her face. His eyes staring into her's.
"No light can exist without a touch of darkness. Just like no darkness can exist without the light. We are all touched by good and evil. Life and death. Light and darkness. We compliment and contrast each other."
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Post by Kasey James on Aug 6, 2016 20:36:48 GMT -7
Kasey stopped when he turned to face her, uncertain of what was going to happen. Yes, he'd mentioned he enjoyed being around her, and that he would mow right over her if she stood in his way, but she hadn't, so why was he--oh. Suddenly, his face quite a bit closer than it had been. She tensed a little at the chin raise, but didn't break eye contact. There was a faint relaxation at the words, hinting at their improv roles from before. More importantly, she understood what he was trying to say on some level, as she had when they'd spoken of philosophy. Of strife and how one could overcome it or control it with their own hard work and skills.
It was true, as well. No one was either one way or another. Life touched everyone in its own way, but that varied from person to person. Did that make them the same/ Maybe, in its own way. That they were all affected, to one degree or another. They all adapted. She couldn't change what Alex had chosen any more than he could her. Not that he'd want to.
"True," she agreed quietly. Several examples she'd seen in her life came to mind. Not that Alex would know of them, but the fact remained that his words caused her to think of them at all.
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Post by Alex Spencer on Aug 7, 2016 14:38:44 GMT -7
He nodded slowly as he removed his finger from her chin. His well practiced and perfect smile glittering into appearance once more as he let out a relieved sigh. She seemed to understand, or at least understand enough. And that meant he could go back to being good company, surely she wouldn't fault him that. She had her own mask that she wore, his just didn't have any fabric to it.
"In the end we all get the freedom to choose our own fate. That's the greatest gift of life. That no matter your standing everyone is given the choice to take their lives into their own hands. To find their own strength and set out against the world. I don't regret my choices in life. And I hope you don't either."
He'd give her a small, gentle nudge with his elbow to her side as he fell back in step with her. Content that she wasn't going to go blab who he was and force him to snap her neck. If they had beef in the future they could settle it then. But for tonight at least, she was a friend. And one he'd like to keep.
"They are the only things that we have all to ourselves."
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Post by Kasey James on Aug 7, 2016 15:52:43 GMT -7
The moment passed as quickly as it had arrived, the familiar smile returning to his face with the drop of a hat. It was the smile she knew charmed others into liking him, and one she'd liked as well. It was amazing how quickly it came and went, leaving Kasey to wonder how readily available it was. This was the one she called a friend.
His words redirected her thoughts; she listened with interest about the idea of taking your fate into your own hands. Sometimes it was argued that going against teh flow just made it push back against you even harder, but if that was the case, would she be where she was now? Would any of them.
Curse him for making her think through all this. Now it felt like she was going in circles inside her own head. But it was something wonder; she'd come this far not accepting her role in life, right?
"Nothing to regret so far," she agreed, a small smile tugging on her face at the elbowing. It was strange, knowing who he was like several side of a dice. For now, at least, she could see that her friend was okay, even if she was still a little on edge. The future? There was no way of knowing until it happened.
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Post by Alex Spencer on Aug 9, 2016 20:49:13 GMT -7
"That's all we can really ask for in the end then."
He said with a small relieved smile as he nodded. No regrets, it was hard to follow that path. It was tempting to play it safe, to stay in your comfort zone. But you could regret the choices that you never made. The times you held yourself back. It was true that by trying and leaving the nest you could fail. You could crash and burn, but to do so and know that you gave it your all surely had to be better than wondering what if. Chasing after what could have been.
"You're new toy was pretty good though. I admit, I underestimated you last time. Should there be a next time I won't make that mistake again."
The smile on his face didn't exactly change so much as he seemed to take on a more predatory glean to him. Like a lion looking at a hunk of meat. Or maybe it was just the Gilgamesh in him peeking out again. He wasn't exactly used to talking about this stuff with anyone other than Limen, and unfortunately Valkyrie. It was actually kind of nice to have an outsider to talk to, someone who knew. Again he found himself hoping he wouldn't have to kill her later. It was becoming a running theme of his night as this little chat went on.
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Post by Kasey James on Aug 10, 2016 20:46:51 GMT -7
"Mhmmm." Kasey nodded, the shadow that loomed over them beginning to fade as they went from more difficult conversation topics to those that were still important, but less likely to result in her getting hurt. It reminded her of the first time they'd met, talking about what they liked before racing each other. He'd been holding back, that went without question now.
A small, nervous laughed escaped her when the tone of their conversation shifted again, glancing to the right when she realized that she was both pleased and wary. It was one thing to note that there were effects, but another for the person who had been targeted to admit as much, let alone praise her for it. Her expression shifted to one of satisfaction, even as she felt she may have signed her doom.
That smile. As much as she believed him, as much as she believed there were good things about him (about Alex?), that smile made her feel like he was the cat while she was the canary. A Canary that was about to be torn apart.
"I'll do my best not to disappoint?" She didn't know if she was going to face off against him again, but it was possible. She'd have to be ready; the added motivation fueled the push she'd been giving lately to change things up and improve. There were plenty of supers out there who were strong or had good stamina; she'd have to learn to pack a bigger punch in a smaller container.
Music blared from a nearby shop as the door opened, a small cluster of teens pouring out and towards the street as their laughed drowned out anything she would have said. She waited until they were past before continuing, the two of them appearing friends talking about routine things and not their current nighttime activities.
"Thanks, though. I didn't think it was going to work when it first went off. Not with your stamina."
Punching Bag, meet Guinea Pig.
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Post by Alex Spencer on Aug 10, 2016 21:45:44 GMT -7
He'd laugh as the teens rolled out of the shop. Nudging her again with his elbow he'd flash her a wink and his predatory grin turned softer. "Well I do have a lot of stamina." His own statement prompted another chuckle from him, whether or not the implication got her flustered. It was fun to act like this, to pretend, or even half pretend for a few moments that he didn't have so much to do. That he wasn't racing toward a sea of blood.
That he didn't love every second of it.
"Though that does remind me. I'm pretty sure you still owe me a date. Assuming I haven't scared you off of course."
He'd understand if he had though. Their encounters at night hadn't exactly been the friendliest. But again he was willing to overlook it if she was. They had to pick their battles, and he wasn't going to hold them being on opposite sides of the fight against her. Not with the kind of fights they'd been meeting over. Tests and favors. Hardly anything ground breaking or close to his heart. Nothing he felt strong loyalty over. Nothing he'd been willing to outright kill her over, yet.
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Post by Kasey James on Aug 11, 2016 19:47:55 GMT -7
She sputtered a laugh at the quip as the teens passed them by, somehow knowing she should have expected it and at the same time not. She hadn't realized how what she'd said could be interpreted until Alex had done so, and while there was a faint tint of pink at her cheeks, it wasn't as prominent as it had been in the past. She shook her head, wondering at the fate that was given to her that Alex - she didn't know how else to put it or call him. What did you call someone who was and was not the friend you'd met? - was asking her out again.
Another time, she would have said yes. If he hadn't admitted to being Gilgamesh, she would have. He was friendly to her and...okay violent and bit creepy, too. She wanted to see how far this niceness went, to see how much of it was there as she believed, but going on a date with someone where it would mean nothing, or nearly so? Suppose they got along; then what? He had already made it clear that he would have no problem putting her down for no reason other than she stood in his way. Whatever else they might have wouldn't change that.
"Sorry, but I'm going to have to pass." She shook her head, offering him a sad little smile for whatever might have been.
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Post by Alex Spencer on Aug 11, 2016 19:59:30 GMT -7
"Afraid I'll kill you."
It wasn't a question, but kind of a knowing statement. He couldn't blame her, he was blunt about it. People deserved to make informed decisions about that kind of thing. And if she was part of that world that put her at risk, unlike when she was the Kasey he had thought she was. That Kasey would have been completely safe. But as long as she insisted in living in this world of monsters he couldn't promise that they wouldn't end up on opposite lines of a battle. And if that happened he'd expect her to do everything in her power to bring him down as well. Because when push comes to shove you need to fight for what you believe in.
Everything else pales in comparison.
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Post by Kasey James on Aug 11, 2016 20:04:51 GMT -7
"Death is kind of permanent." Though she tried to make light of the situation, the smile fell and gave way to thoughts that went beyond her moment with Alex. Thoughts to what she had seen of people, just humans and not supers, having fights. Standing on opposite sides. Not caring that it was a loved one that they stood against, because they fought for what they believed in.
Even when what they believed in was falling apart.
"Not really the death thing. I've...that happens." The thoughts gave way to a small frown as she regarded him with her full attention, expression serious.
"What would it mean? Would it be real? Pretend?"
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Post by Alex Spencer on Aug 11, 2016 20:09:25 GMT -7
"Oh Kasey. Even if it was pretend, it would be real."
You couldn't go through life wondering how everyone else felt about every interaction. Worried that someone feels something at a different intensity. What mattered was how real it was to you, and what it meant to you. He couldn't fathom even having a question like that, it was just so silly, and despite himself he chuckled into a hand that rose up to try and stifle it. It was cute that she was worried about something as small as that with everything else that went on around them. They may be the same age, but she was still so young.
"I was just offering milkshakes and my company. I don't know what will happen after that, what either of us will feel. I'm just trying to be honest cause I figure you deserve to know. I'd never do anything to harm you. Ever. But the Bird.... She lives in another world."
And he would kill Canary without hesitation.
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Post by Kasey James on Aug 12, 2016 18:50:29 GMT -7
Kasey stared at Alex for a moment as his words reached her, but the laughter he tried to hide brought an embarrassed flush to her cheeks that stood out more than the realization of her verbal slip. How was that funny? Sure, she didn't know if they'd even do anything after tonight, and sometimes things took a slow burn to even out or even work, but that wasn't the point. The point was why try if it was only you that felt anything? Why go for a one-sided relationship of any variety?
"I guess." The flush faded slightly as her frown returned, though that too faded into uncertainty, then something softer as he promised not to hurt her. That, she believed, just as she knew it wasn't about Canary. But Canary was someone she chose to be, just as much as he chose to be Gilgamesh, right? Then again, maybe not. He didn't know her reasons any more than she did his, and in a way, it didn't matter. It would be nice to trust him enough to share that, but she wasn't sure she coudl bring herself to it.
But if it was just once, would it hurt?
...Why was she considering this?
"And if it's one-sided?" Again she looked at him, more curious to his reaction and gauging it against her own.
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