Pandaemonium
Posts 343
Power Level 30
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Post by Blue Jay on Jan 19, 2017 23:16:44 GMT -7
After the milk was poured, there was but a brief window of time in which the cereal remained crunchy. Blue Jay had to act swiftly, and did so; he loosened the straps of his mask and lifted it up so it covered the upper half of his face and his nose. To further help hide the small visible part of his face, he hunched far over the table so his head was level with his shoulders and above his bowl, and his elbows were on either side. The first time he’d eaten at base, he figured if people could figure out his face from what was normally visible and the small bit of his chin and mouth now, they were probably going to figure it out anyway. This logic hadn’t changed. His right hand held his mask in place and his left was go with the spoon.
Why Aurora liked this cereal, he hadn’t the slightest, besides the only pattern he picked up in her tastes and preferences was they never ceased to surprise him. Even large sums of sugar or fresh fruit couldn’t save the gunk. But if nothing else, it would at least serve as calories and a counter of sorts to the bitterness of the juice. Blue Jay talked through his food.
“You say that like I don’t help with your list of things.” He chuckled. “Plus, your pressing stuff was restocking the cupboards and watering the plants, right? I took care of those last night. I’m surprised you think something as important as death is useless bullshit, though. And curious why you keep trying to change the subject.”
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Pandaemonium
Posts 381
Power Level 31
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Post by Aurora Disicio on Jan 20, 2017 12:11:11 GMT -7
His claim was enough for her to at least look at him. It would explain how the fridge got restocked while she was asleep. Aurora hadn't checked the plants yet, but they'd gone a few days without a proper watering. If he really did find her yesterday, then she wasn't surprised that those were the final two things on her mind before falling asleep. Blue Jay didn't seem like the type to take credit for other peoples' work, so there was little reason to doubt that he was the one that did it. It's not like anyone knew what her internal list of things to do was, so there was also little doubt that he heard about it from her. Aurora sighed and rubbed her forehead as she finished chewing. She could afford to humor him for a moment.
"If I indulged everyone's neuroticism I'd never get anything done. You're projecting your own emotions onto me and creating problems in your mind that don't exist. I'm not exaggerating when I say there's nothing to talk about. There's nothing wrong. I've got it covered. Don't worry about it. Therefore, talking is completely pointless."
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Pandaemonium
Posts 343
Power Level 30
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Post by Blue Jay on Jan 21, 2017 19:55:12 GMT -7
Blue Jay suppressed a laugh, and had to raise a hand to his mouth to keep from spitting out milk. He swallowed before he could choke himself on the rest of his cereal.
“And here I thought it was my job to make the easy to dismantle arguments.” He chuckled. “Just because you can’t get to everyone’s doesn’t mean you can’t indulge anyone’s neuroticism, or whatever you want to call it. That’s like saying just because you can’t do every batch of dishes in the city, you’re not going to do any dishes at all. That’s a silly excuse to not deal with things you don’t want to deal with and you’re using it like a cherry picker. If you’re going to call that a valid reason for yourself, at least go all the way and apply it to everything.”
Because they were around other people, he’d lowered his voice so that Aurora’d be able to hear him over the background noise, but the background noise was unlikely to hear him. Just in case it mattered. He twirled the spoon in his hand between his intermittent bites.
“You keep saying nothing’s wrong, but what you’re doing, the amount of work you’re taking on, it isn’t healthy. You said so yourself. That implies something is wrong, and I’m seriously worried you don’t have it covered because it’s been three months now and you’re not doing any better. If anything, you’ve gotten worse. And I am going to worry about it because that’s just what I do. Besides,” He continued cheerfully, pausing from his food to give her a smile, “it’s never a bad thing to talk about something, just like it’s never a bad thing to humor an idea. Even if you do end up proving it wrong or that there’s nothing there at all, you reaffirm you were right. It’ll give you a stronger argument when someone inevitably asks again.”
A poor timed spin of the spoon on his hand, a long drink of the juice, and the following shutter from the bitterness resulted in the spoon being dropped. It clanged against the bowl and table before he scooped it up and continued his thought. “Also, you changed the subject again - unless you’re saying your plans for what’s going to happen to the faction if you die aren’t important, in which case I’m going to be seriously worried because that’s very important to a lot of people - and you’re still avoiding the question. Questions. All of them. See, this is why I’m worried you’re hiding or suppressing or don’t want to admit or deal with something.”
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Pandaemonium
Posts 381
Power Level 31
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Post by Aurora Disicio on Jan 22, 2017 14:18:41 GMT -7
"I suppose it is when you make up your own argument and call it mine." Aurora's glare returned in full force. "What the hell makes you so important that I should take the time to help you with your stupid problems? I don't care if it's because you're worried about me, it's not my problem. My time is valuable, and I don't have the patience or energy for this shit."
Aurora took another bite of cereal, her chewing noticeably more forceful than it was before. She still had no idea what he was so worried about. The only thing she could understand were her sleeping, and possibly eating, habits. She had no illusions that this was somehow okay, but she didn't care. There were more important things to worry about than her physical well being. The rest she could only assume was him projecting his own emotions onto her, and from something she said while half asleep. She was easy to misunderstand when she couldn't think straight, it wouldn't be that surprising.
"Drinking soda and eating processed food isn't good for you either, but somehow I doubt that'll stop you. We all make decisions about what to do with our life and our health, this isn't unusual. I'm not changing the subject or dodging your questions. I've said multiple times now that I'm not going to talk about this because it's pointless. I could take the time to detail everything to you, but why would I? What would it accomplish? I don't even care about your opinion, why would I waste my time trying to change it? You are not entitled to my time, my energy, or information on my personal life."
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Pandaemonium
Posts 343
Power Level 30
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Post by Blue Jay on Jan 24, 2017 23:57:35 GMT -7
Blue Jay let out a long sigh. This was going in circles, and small ones at that. What was even happening? It used to be harder to get Aurora to stop talking about stuff like this, and now she wouldn’t even humor him with a sentence of an opinion? He set the spoon down on the table with a soft click.
“You really have changed, haven’t you?” He muttered, just loud enough to be heard over the noise of the space. His shoulders hunched and his hand lingered on the neck of the spoon. Absently, he rocked it back and forth. “You used to care about what everyone, even some newbie idiot hero like me, had to say. You would explain every damn detail, and you know exactly why you did it; you’ve told me loudly before. You used to care about helping people better themselves. Now it’s like this,” he made a small gesture with his free hand to the building, “is all that matters.”
He grinned an ironic smile. “The power has gone to your head, hasn’t it?” He chuckled. “Didn’t think it’d be in this way, but what do you know. It’s like all you can see now is furthering your vision of Pandaemonium. You’re putting into it every one of your waking moments - hell, every moment you should be sleeping too - and now things that used to matter to you don’t any more and you no longer care. It’s like you think you’re above me now. Above all of us, because you’re the distant leader who has the power to dictate exactly what you want.” Blue Jay’s voice slowly began to grow louder, and his brow knotted under his mask, but he never quite reached a yell. “You don’t let unpowereds stay at base, which is alienating what used to be a good part of our faction. You’re getting people to help you with your plans without considering what others - like that huge elephant of the unpowerds - need or want, and complain when we’re busy with our own like you’re entitled to our time and energy. When was the last time you helped someone with something they asked your help for? When someone goes against the rules you’ve set, how do you respond? With violence. You’re ruling with a hand of force and an ear deaf to others. And now you’ve got better things to do than talk with a guy who’s been spending hours of his day helping you with your goals like you used to before you became leader.” His grin and chuckle briefly returned. “I asked you a while ago what you thought the goal of life was, and you had no problems answering that in detail. But why you’re afraid of failure, you know, that thing the majority of people are afraid of, now that’s really stepping past some boundaries, isn’t it?”
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Pandaemonium
Posts 381
Power Level 31
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Post by Aurora Disicio on Jan 27, 2017 8:19:58 GMT -7
Aurora frowned, and absentmindedly poked at her cereal. He was wrong in a lot of was, but there were some things there that stung. Not being able to interact with people directly left a hole in her heart. It was nice to watch the city progress, or to watch her organization grow and become more united, but it couldn't replace people. Sure, her efforts would help them grow in a lot of ways, since they didn't have to worry about food, water, and shelter (at least the ones she had room in the base for), but even that wasn't the same as directly interacting with them. It wasn't that she thought she was above them. She just didn't have time for a lot of the things she used to do and she wasn't happy about it.
His rant on her enforcement made her raise her eyebrow. What did he think law enforcement was? How often was he shot by the police? Aurora couldn't just let people take more than their share of the food, kill each other, or mug people. If she wanted that to stop, she had to do something about it. Even normal society had their laws, and anyone that didn't follow them was dealt with. With force no less. Most of the time they would be fined or put into a cage, but she didn't have any place to put the 'criminals' of Pandaemonium, so she had to use the means she did have. No society can let people break the rules and get away with it. His entire argument was so stupid it wasn't even worth commenting on. She swirled her cereal a bit longer before taking a bite.
"I can't do anything more than what I'm already doing," she started after she finished chewing. "I'm just trying to secure food, water, and shelter right now. Those are things everyone needs. Even if they don't think it's an issue...it's very likely it will be as more people leave the city. And you said it yourself, I don't even have room for everyone right now. There's not even much point in trying to get another building because I won't be able to maintain it. I'm already having enough trouble as it is keeping up with this one. I've squeezed every last drop of time out of my schedule." Aurora put her elbow on the table, leaned her forehead against her hand, and started rubbing her forehead. "I can't get away with getting less sleep than I already do. I already decided not to take classes this term because there's too much to do here. I could probably squeeze a few more hours in if I stopped doing things like showering, brushing my teeth, going to the bathroom, or spending a bit of time to collect my thoughts, but those are likely to do more harm than good. I should suck it up and get Dullahan to remove my need for sleep already," she sighed. "There is really nothing more I can do.
"I don't coerce people into helping me. Hell, I don't even ask people to do anything directly. I make it clear what I need, and then I compensate them for their work when they do it. That's hardly being entitled to someone's work. Even if they do nothing, they'll have access to everything here and everything I do. Because everyone should have access to basic amenities. I'm not going to repeatedly bother or harass people because they're not doing what I want them to be doing, as long as they're not breaking the rules." She looked up at Blue Jay and narrowed her eyes.
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Pandaemonium
Posts 343
Power Level 30
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Post by Blue Jay on Jan 28, 2017 22:16:04 GMT -7
Blue Jay’s head dipped even lower. She wasn’t getting this at all. Not only had she avoided his question and point - again - but she was talking like all of this was unavoidable. Maybe it was just him and he was jumping to assumptions. He’d like to think he was just jumping to assumptions, because it’d mean Aurora wasn’t as blind as he was becoming seriously worried she was. She may as well have told him the birds had stopped singing in the spring when she told him she’d stopped going to classes; there wasn’t anything else she could’ve said to solidly confirm in his head that something was terribly, horribly wrong. Besides following it up with the thought that she’d actually consider removing her need for sleep.
Blue Jay was done eating. He straightened, pulled his mask back over the lower half of his face, and turned to Aurora. His arm was firmly on the table and the other on his hip, and he returned her narrowed look in full. What else were friends for but to repeatedly bother and harass her about obvious problems? He’d take it and would keep on doing it.
“Who decided you were going to try to take over and repair an entire building?” He asked sternly. “How about securing enough food and water for everyone in Pandaemonium, even after knowing you weren’t going to get much help? Or prioritize work over sleep, or your health, or anything besides the faction? Who made the decision to not include unpowered experts who might be willing to be paid over the black market to help, despite the piles of cash I suspect you have stored under your bed? Who’s decided that unpowereds leaving the city is an inevitability instead of an issue that should be addressed and lessened?” His voice was raising, but again never to a full yell. “Who decided you were going to completely overhaul a faction, and society itself? That you would work yourself into the ground to do all of it at once? Why the hell are you doing this to yourself?!”
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Pandaemonium
Posts 381
Power Level 31
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Post by Aurora Disicio on Jan 29, 2017 14:16:42 GMT -7
Even as his voice rose, her gaze and glare didn't waver in the slightest. Aurora continued eating her cereal, only half paying attention. He was grossly misinformed and was just repeating himself at this point. Sure, the point of Pandaemonium for her was to be something for supers. They were her priority. It pissed her off when every conversation about supers had to become about unpowered people too. They were not her focus, she should not have to talk about them. Supers should be able to have their own space without having to think about unpowered people constantly. But that didn't mean she ignored them completely.
She assumed that most of the people helping with the reconstruction of the docks after the shark-shaped dragon did not have powers. Same with the people that renovated the base. Aurora had no proof one way or the other, she didn't bother to check. It wasn't important in this case. She assumed this because of their age and the fact that they weren't shooting lasers from their eyes to help them tear down walls. The reason she paid them so much was only half to attract their attention. After all, they probably had some reservations about working for a known supervillain. The other half was because the majority of them were poor people from the dock area and they deserved better than what they had. If she wasn't so focused on super issues, she figured she'd be focusing on poverty instead. However, there wasn't enough time to do both and super issues were more important right now. She wasn't going to apologize for prioritizing supers, and she wasn't going to expand her efforts beyond them because it made some people feel bad.
Aurora finished off her cereal and rubbed the bridge of her nose as she tried to figure out how to explain this to him. After a moment, it became clear that it wasn't worth it. This is where they were ideologically opposed. It came up in several of their past conversations. While she'd like to convert him to the correct side, it wasn't important enough for her to invest her time and energy into right now. Maybe after everything died down and everything was working. Seeing it would prove more effective than talking about it. She gently put her hands on the table as she stood up and collected her dishes to put in the sink.
"I don't blame anyone for my choices," her voice was completely calm. As much as the situation irritated her, she couldn't muster up the indignation for anything more. "I also don't regret any of my choices, even knowing what I know now. There are some things more important than me."
Without waiting for a response, she cleaned up her dishes and took a moment to decide on what to do next. Aurora still needed to research bridges and try to find some solutions for better waterproofing. She wanted to put out some feelers for powers that might help with that too, but after all this annoying conversation she wasn't in the mood to deal with people right now. Research was fine. She didn't bother waiting to hear what Blue Jay had to say, partially because she had the feeling he'd be right behind her, when she started to head back to her office.
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Pandaemonium
Posts 343
Power Level 30
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Post by Blue Jay on Jan 30, 2017 23:28:40 GMT -7
They’d been rhetorical questions begging an obvious answer, and he was glad she was aware of at least as much as all of this was her choice.
“Good.” He stood up after Aurora, collecting his own dishes and food items. “Then you should know you don’t have to do any of the stupid things you’re doing.”
Some things more important than her, she’d said. The things she’d decided were important, she meant. It was completely worth driving herself into the ground like a plain in a nose dive for.
He was indeed right behind her as she headed back to her office. He’d been close behind her from the table, until he’d needed to break to put away the juice and lost her to the cafeteria. Usually Blue Jay tried to move around people when making his way through a crowded area - be conscientious of other people’s movements and all that - but he was trying to catch up with Aurora and was unafraid to plow through anyone in his path. If they didn’t move, he moved them. It was somewhere in the hallways when his angrily fast pace brought him close enough to her tail to say something about it.
Loudly. “You have to be able to see you’re running yourself off a cliff. Are you trying to get yourself killed?! Do you want to turn yourself into a martyr?!”
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Pandaemonium
Posts 381
Power Level 31
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Post by Aurora Disicio on Feb 1, 2017 20:07:06 GMT -7
Aurora just sighed and rolled her eyes as he followed her to the sink. Normally she'd be happy he was at least cleaning up after himself, but it was clear that wasn't the entire reason for it. She hadn't even been up for an hour and she was already getting tired. This was exactly why she didn't talk to people, especially him, as often anymore. It typically left her with a headache and nothing to show for it.
Blue Jay's outburst in the hallways was enough to get her to momentarily stop and turn around. She had a flat expression with an eyebrow raised, and her arms folded. Briefly, she wanted to ask 'seriously?' but in the end it would just be a waste of words. Aurora doubted he even knew what he was talking about at this point.
"Obviously I don't have to do this. I don't have to do anything and no one can make me do anything I don't want to do. Meaning, if you can get it through your thick skull long enough to actually understand this time, I am doing what I want to do. And then you talk using all this ridiculous hyperbole and wonder why I consider talking to you a complete waste of time right now. What the hell is wrong with you? Fuck off."
Aurora sounded more exasperated any angry. She didn't wait for a response before turning around, letting her coat billow behind her.
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Pandaemonium
Posts 343
Power Level 30
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Post by Blue Jay on Feb 1, 2017 20:34:51 GMT -7
Blue Jay was, in fact, not going to fuck off. His eyes narrowed and his shoulders raised, and when she began off again, he followed with several long strides. As soon as there was space, he teleported inches in front of her. He was going to continue to demand her attention, a point he accentuated by attempting to put his hands on her shoulders (and to keep her from walking into him, just in case).
“Stop stating the obvious and answer my fucking question.” He shoved through his teeth. He wasn’t quite sure what it was about her constant avoidance of what he was asking, her picking and choosing of what he said she would respond do that bothered him so much, but it was getting under his skin. Maybe because it was different; a sign she really had changed, and not for what he saw as the better. It scared him. “Why are you doing things that are going to get you killed?!”
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Pandaemonium
Posts 381
Power Level 31
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Post by Aurora Disicio on Feb 2, 2017 8:42:26 GMT -7
If he didn't put his arms out, she would have walked right into him. Teleporting meant Aurora didn't have any time at all to react to his presence, and she was walking fast enough that stopping would have been difficult. The contact was enough to make her jump. Once she realized what happened, her expression flattened again, and she directed her elbow to swiftly strike him in the soft spot where his ribs joined in the center of his chest.
"Getting distracted on my way to bed is what made you think that. Not being a very public and noticeable super. Not taking down dangerous criminal groups. Not confronting law enforcement. Not even fighting off fucking dragons. Letting myself get sleepy. You're being ridiculous."
Aurora paused and tried to push her way past him again. Even if it meant physically dragging him along with her she intended to get back to her office so she could have a quiet place to conduct her research. There were too many things she needed to understand and not enough time to do it.
"I'm not going to live in fear of my own death, but the odds of my sleeping habits contributing to it are so slim they're not even worth considering. Especially not when we seem to have a reasonably good idea of when dragons are going to show up, so I can rest beforehand. Seriously, work through your issues and leave me out of it."
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Pandaemonium
Posts 343
Power Level 30
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Post by Blue Jay on Feb 2, 2017 12:09:47 GMT -7
The elbow alone was enough to get him to let go of her. Blue Jay never made the pretense of being a particularly good roadblock; he recoiled inwards and took a stumbling step backwards with the following push, and the way could be considered fully cleared. His reaction was more one of surprise than in pain. Though, really, he should know better than to be surprised by this by now.
“Of course I’m worried about you doing those things!” He coughed. A couple of deep breaths lowered the pain into the ‘mildly annoying’ category, and he began taking long strides to catch up and keep up with her pace. “I’m fucking scared someone - or a dragon - is going to get the jump on you or prove themselves stronger, but I know you’re capable enough to handle the situation and smart enough to not get in too deep. But thinking passing out in the street because you’re so tired isn’t going to make you an easier target is egotistical and just plain stupid. When the fuck did developing dangerous, stupid habits to get work done at unreasonable and unnecessary rates become more important that your wellbeing and life?!” He picked up at a yell again. “You can slow down, you know. It’d do your life expectancy some good!”
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Pandaemonium
Posts 381
Power Level 31
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Post by Aurora Disicio on Feb 5, 2017 16:59:13 GMT -7
Aurora made her way for the door to the stairwell with no concern for Blue Jay's apparent pain. He deserved it as far as she was concerned. Once there, she opened the door with far more force than necessary, and held it open long enough to look over her shoulder one more time. Her expression was flat with obvious disdain. The answer to his question was simple. Insults aside, she did this often. Most of the time it just didn't take more than a week or two for her to finish her project. A project of this scale was new, and it was taking months to complete. It didn't bother her that much in the end. Finishing this was more important than her long term health, especially when she probably wasn't going to live to see thirty anyway.
"You clearly don't know me that well. Stop pretending like you do. I can't be useless like you can. When I see something blatantly wrong like this it'll eat at me until I fix it. So for the third fucking time, since you're so intent on making me repeat myself today, I don't have to do anything. No one can make me do anything. I'm doing what I want to be doing."
With that, she made her to the stairs, not bothering to hold the door behind her. If he wanted to keep following her so badly he could deal with it.
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Pandaemonium
Posts 343
Power Level 30
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Post by Blue Jay on Feb 7, 2017 2:01:59 GMT -7
There was no point. There was absolutely no point, he was coming to realize, because Aurora didn’t give a damn. She apparently didn’t care that she was burning her candle at both ends when there wasn’t any good reason he could think of to do so. Or else it would eat at her, like a lack of sleep wasn’t going to do that too. Even he’d figured trying to accomplish huge tasks in a short amount of time - mostly by herself - was just going to cause more harm than good, but she either hadn’t made that connection and didn’t care to or thought she was going to be the exception. Or maybe the flaming downfall he was growing increasingly worried for was an acceptable outcome for her and she was just going to keep throwing brute force at what she thought was wrong with the world. He didn’t know. Yeah, maybe he didn’t know everything about her, but at least he could see there was a problem here.
He caught the door just as it was closing and swung it open hard enough that it rebounded off of the wall and pounded down the stairs after her.
His voice had a similar force. “Why?! Just, why, of all the ways you could accomplish your goals, or not be ‘useless’ or whatever, is this the way you have to do it?!”
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